Monday, June 23, 2008

If I Only Had a Brain...



I'm gleaning material. Lots and lots of material. The problem is, any future books I write with pregnant characters are probably going to get rejected for lack of realism. Unfortunately, my preggo mistakes are all too realistic!!

For example: In the past three months I've: walked straight into the men's room in a very crowded restaurant (yes, there were witnesses, and yes I'm still an unnatural shade of red), informed my friend that there was potato in onion rings, gone the wrong way down a one-way street downtown, almost ran over an innocent pedestrian trying to walk into Barnes & Noble (she came out of NOWHERE!) searched online for an hour for the name of a cologne that didn't exist (long, long story - I think my mom and sister are STILL laughing at me) tripped over my own flip-flops, and bumped into so many doorframes that I keep continual bruises. I'm sure there is more, but I forget. (which is also something I do regularly!) You've gotta laugh, right? I mean, what else can you do? (other than break down into hysterical sobs, but I've done that too and laughing is much better!) =)

I'm thinking my daughter is going to be a genius. Otherwise, where are all my brain cells going?? Regardless, I can certainly relate to the poor scarecrow in The Wizard Of Oz.

I would not be just a nuffin'
My head all full of stuffin'
My heart all full of pain I would dance and be merry
Life would be a ding-a-derry...
If I only had a brain!

What's been really fun is seeing how being pregnant relates to my writing.

My crit buds stay super busy fixing more typos than usual (sometimes now I just leave out words altogether in the middle of a sentence!) yet, surprisingly, I've been more productive than usual. I guess since I don't necessarily write EVERY day, (a girl's gotta rest sometimes, you know!) the time I DO spend writing during the week or on weekends is very productive. I guess it all balances out in the end. (whew)

Okay, so dish. Any funny preggo stories from your own experiences? Share here! (and share the embarassment, PLEASE!) =)

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Okay, the only one that comes to mind for me wasn't my pregnancy, but a complete strangers. I was working at a nightclub in my twenties and a very pregnant looking lady came in. Wanting to be friendly I asked, "Congratualtions! When are you due?" She promptly told me she'd had the baby two months earlier. BWMFR From here on out, I try to find out if someone is preggers before I open my mouth:)

Kassy Paris said...

Could the organizer of this blog contact me? My TWRP White Rose novel went online last week and I'd like to know if my writing partner and I could join this blog. Thanks.

Kara Lynn Russell said...

Betsy,
This is a story our lamaze coach told us - There was a woman who was admitted to the hospital in labor. She had her baby in the elevator on the way to the delivery room. Because she was obviously so upset about this, the nurse tried to console her by saying "This kind of thing happens all the time. A couple of years ago a woman actually gave birth on the sidewalk in front of the hospital." The woman's response - "I know. It was me!"

Is this a true story? Who knows?
Kara

Kara Lynn Russell said...

But seriously -
My obstetrician told me that your center of balance changes when you are pregnant, which causes all that clumsiness. Please be careful, Betsy. When I was pregnant with my youngest, I took a fall that caused her to be born early, and I still have problems with my back thirteen years later.
Kara

Sarita Leone said...

No pregnant stories here, only good wishes for you! :)